Get it? Semisonic? “Closing Time?” GET IT?

In 2012, I moved out of my house in Conshohocken and into a row home in Philadelphia. Moving, it is not revolutionary to say, is a total and complete pain in the ass, but even within that context, I was blown away at how annoying it was to move my record collection. I had to jam all my records into two big Tupperware bins and, while records are pretty light when taken one at a time, those bins were heavy as fuck. I didn’t mind moving my mattress from the second floor to the first floor by myself, but schleping those records from the burbs to the city is what sticks in my head as being the end-all symbol of how crappy moving is.

Anyway, with that in mind, I’m moving again. Which means I have to move my records again. This time, however, I’m trying to cut some shit out. Maybe get from two bins down to one.

And so, the culling has begun. Herein lay the first round of cuts. These are the easiest records to part with, the ones I am least attached to. I plan to do another round of cuts and … those will be hard. If you want any of the records below, get at me. First come, first served. If you can pick them up in Philly, great. If you want me to ship them to you, we can work something out.

One more thing: all the records are in working order, as far as I know. Some of these I haven’t listened to in a while, some I haven’t listened to ever. If you’re looking for pristine shit, I can’t promise it.

7 Inch Records:

David Bowie – Absolute Beginners
This one is almost worth it for how Bowie looks on the cover. He looks like the devil in a 1940s journalist outfit.

David Bowie – Tight Connection to my Heart
This is a single from a record called Empire Burlesque, a record that I did not know existed until just this moment.

James Brown – Get Up Off That Thing / Release the Pressure
I used to think I would throw more parties than I do. CLAIMED

The Who – Who Are You / Had Enough
I like the Who, but I’ve owned this since right after college and I’ve listened to it approximately one time.

Ray Parker Jr. – Ghostbusters Theme Song
I … I might end up keeping this one. I still might throw those parties someday. CLAIMED

Cults – Abducted
Remeber Cults? Remember this song? This is that song, except I bought it for $7 at Record Story Day because I’m not always good with money. Anyway, if you’re a blog-rock scene kid from 2011, you might like this (Editor’s Note: way to have the most literal video ever, Cults).

Surfer Blood – Demon Dance / Slow Six
I’ve reached the conclusion that Surfer Blood sucks. I’m hoping you have not reached that conclusion.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Skeletons
I really like “Skeletons,” and I’ll bet It’s Blitz holds up better than I think, but I never just want to listen to one song. There’s a live version on this single, and that’s pretty good, too.

Built to Spill – Water Sleepers
Another Record Story Day impulse buy. Built to Spill are the kings, though.

Sakes Alive! – Act 1
Back when I was unemployed, I wrote record reviews as a means to make very, very little money and get some free music. Sakes Alive! is a hardcore band from Rochester NY that sent me their record to review. It’s pretty good and I think anyone who likes loud music would like it, but it seems like a strange hold-over artifact to me now. CLAIMED

Against Me! – I was a Teenage Anarchist (single)
Studio and acoustic version. I like the song, though. CLAIMED

The Pretenders – Thin Line Between Love and Hate
My Mom likes the Pretenders. I like my Mom. I thought the transitive property would work. It didn’t.

Full Albums, etc:

Perfect Pussy – Say Yes to Love
Turns out, I’m not into Perfect Pussy at all. Bought this about two months ago, just don’t like it. CLAIMED

Algernon Cadwallader – Parrot Flies
Algernon Cadwallader are the goddamn best, but I rarely find myself in the headspace to listen to this record any more. CLAIMED

Hop Along – Get Disowned
I’m hanging on to my Wretches 7′, because I still think it’s the best example of how full-band Hop Along could work, but this never clicked for me. I’m so out of step with the scene kids.

The Gaslight Anthem – Handwritten
This album stinks, but “45” is pretty great.

Sundowner – Neon Fiction
I’m going to keep supporting Lawrence Arms projects, because we have to protect the Lawrence Arms at all costs, but I can do without this one. CLAIMED

The Flatliners – Dead Languages
“Resuscitation of the Year” and “Birds of England” are total crushers, but I’ve cooled on this record significantly. That said, people really seem to dig it, and I recommend it to someone trying to find some new punk to get into. CLAIMED

Hardeman – Scream!
As you can see by this Google image search, Hardeman probably considers himself quite the lover.

Dinosaur Jr – I Bet on Sky
The least of the three Dino Jr full length reunion records.

Gen X – 4
This has “Dancing With Myself” on it, so it’s automatically worth whatever I paid for it.

Big Country – Peace in our Time
The only person who is going to accept this record is Joe Pelone.

Bruce Spingsteen – Born in the USA
I’m keeping Nebraska and The River, but since those cool-guy record parties I had in my head never really happened, and because I’m aging faster than one of those inbred, purebreed dogs, I really don’t think I need to hang on to this in the hopes someone wants to dance to “Glory Days.”

Van Halen – Van Halen 2
I … might hang on to this one too.

Twin Shadow – Confess
Twin Shadow looks fucking absurd on this record.  CLAIMED

Jethro Tull – Aqualung
SITTING ON A PARK BENCH / EYEING LITTLE GIRLS WITH BAD INTENT CLAIMED

Charlie Brown – A Charlie Brown Christmas
I’m not having ugly sweater parties anymore. Time to pass the torch.

Mitch Ryder – All Hits!
With this record, you too will be able to let everyone know that you went through a High Fidelity phase.

Randy Newman – River of Dreams
I found this and Neil Young’s American Stars in Bars at the same time. I’m keeing Stars in Bars because, though I think everything on that album is pretty bad outside “Hurricane,” my Dad really likes the album and I think it’d be poor son work if I just tossed it to the wolves. However, there must be a balance, and so Randy Newman has to go.

Bob Segar and the Silver Bullet Band – Night Moves
Doug, take your hat off, “Night Moves” is playing. I shouldn’t even be giving this away. This was always truly Brett Cumbo’s.

38 Special – s/t
I used to think that, because “Hold on Loosely” and “Caught up in You” are awesome, all 38 Special songs are awesome. I now think differently.

Band of Horses – Cease to Begin
Good record. Great songs on it. Record is in good shape. I don’t know, it just feels like it’s time to let go.

Say Hi – Um, Uh Oh
Used to spin this all. The. Time while I did work from home. It’s a great thing to just put on and let run. Since I don’t work from home anymore, not much reason to keep it.

Fucked Up – Let Likes Be Cured By Likes
Bought this for way too much money, listened to it way too few times. True fact, this record came from Mystery Train in Gloucster, MA, a record store that remains beautiful, perhaps because it continues to exist and be excellent despite living in a fisherman town. CLAIMED

The Special AKA – Racist Friend
I was in Baltimore with Meagan and I saw a record called Racist Friend. There was no way I wasn’t going to buy it. Chicks dig dudes who buy albums called Racist Friend.

Wild Man Steve – King of Them All
Wanted garage rock, ended up with a comedy album. The cover is fantastic, though.

Michael Kiwanuka – Home Again
Dude has an incredible voice.

Bomb the Music Industry! – Album Minus Band
I have this band’s whole discography in physical form, but I’m letting this one go becuse A) I’m no longer trying to be a completest and B) this is my least favorite, despite “Busy Day of Sleeping In” and “Panic Bomb” being VERY IMPORTANT songs. CLAIMED

Okkervil River – The Stage Names
Great, great record, yet it never seems to get its number called. Come for “Unless it Kicks,” stay for “John Allyn Sails.” CLAIMED

Hot Water Music – Live at the Hard Rock
Great record, but I’ve already got Caution and Fuel for the Hate Game. I’m good here. CLAIMED

The Offspring – Ignition
My days of being an Offspring apologist are over. Good songs here though. I especially like “Session,” “Dirty Magic,” “No Hero,” and the reminder that this band wasn’t always a joke. CLAIMED

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