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Eloise Botsford, Free
I don’t think I’ve listened to this song since my grandmother died and I’m not sure I ever will. All Eternals Deck came out in March of 2011. My grandmother died in July of 2011. I listened to the album probably 30 times before my grandmother got sick. It was all I could listen to…
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The Best Parts of Jeff, Who Lives At Home
I recently watched Jeff, Who Lives at Home while on a train to Albany, New York and enjoyed it a great deal. It was a cute, unassuming B+ of a movie that I would recommended to people with a penchant for existential thinking or people in troubled relationships. Here are the best parts of that…
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I’m on Vacation, Part 1
Go get your giggles somewhere else. I’m going to the beach. You guys should 1) watch Breaking Bad 2) listen to the Men
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Bands That Sound Like Other Bands, According to my Dad
My father, Tony, is a smart, successful, accomplished man who is, slowly but surely, completely losing his mind. Mind loss is a constant in my family. Seemingly every member of my family over the age of 50 is suffering from a metal degradation that, over time, reduces responsible, well-adjusted adults into the braying loony old…
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Party at the Beach, Oh Baby, Oh Baby
I’m heading out to the beach for a week. Here are my goals while I am there: Only check my work email once, and for no longer than 30 minutes Finish four books Get drunk on the beach in secret during the middle of the day. I will do this by utilizing red cups, a…
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Get it Together, North Carolina
I took this picture about two months ago while on a golf trip in North Carolina. The fact that this sign needs to exist is totally fucked up. Now, I take no issue with the root concept behind the sign. I think people who work in the food service industry should wash their hands after…
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My Life is a Funky Disco Lie
I have been having a disco renaissance in the last month. While I understand why my father hated disco the way that I hate snap music, crunk and reggeton, I can no longer deny that I love this shit. It hasn’t been all fun and games, though. I’ve had to face some harsh, baffling truths…
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Seeing the Movie “Ted” For a Second Time
For heat-related issues not worth getting into, I have seen the Seth MacFarlane movie Ted twice in two weeks. While Ted might not seem like the kid of movie a person would need to see twice, let alone twice in eight days, it fits right in on the list of movies I have seen more…
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The Internet is Trying to Send Pitbull to Alaska and I Hope it Works
Here are the things I know about Pitbull, a rapper / R-rated Black Eyed Peas surrogate / inexplicably successful pop artist. He fancies himself quite the lover. Many songs contain boasts of his sexual prowess and potentially exaggerated situations in which he engaged in explicit sex acts with one-or-more beautiful women, despite the fact that…
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